Colours and Light | Created by Alex Wain

(An article I wrote during the middle of 2008, which I thought I should share with you.)

NOBODY EVER TELLS….

There was no warning, but the alarm bells are already ringing.

The circumstances and situations of the past couple of days, have only hastened the urgency with which I write this post.

Whilst the world is holding its breath waiting for Obama, I’m encouraged to let you know that aliens haven’t landed to assume control of Earth, nor is there a gigantic and terrifying monster tearing down skyscrapers in the distance. So in terms of terrors on that scale you’re safe………for now. In fact, the crisis we face won’t be broadcast in the media. They won’t set up committees to talk about it. They won’t brief the President or assign a special task force with bullet proof vests to disarm it.

Despite going through years of quality education, even YOU haven’t been fully made aware of the impact of this imminent threat. It’s unnerving, stealth like, a necessity and above all unquestionably unavoidable.

So what exactly IS this danger lurking in our midst?

It’s called OLD AGE.

Simple, hardly shocking and yet it’s an issue which will plague and vex you for years to come. And nobody can genuinely prepare you for it. In fact since you’ve started reading this blog you’ve just stepped a little closer to that retirement village – horrifying thought I know, but alarmingly real.

I’ve been given a few glaringly obvious reminders of my mortality recently and I can’t say I’m particularly enjoying it.If you’re on a social networking site, if you’re looking for people, if you’re on a dating site, if you’re filling in a form, there is always the 18-25 field. When you hit 26 and beyond, suddenly you are in an entirely new realm, a new demographic, part of a new target audience. It’s one which is both intimidating and wildly perplexing.

I’ve noticed that hangovers last half the day, rather than half an hour the next morning. Staying out until past midnight suddenly seems like a big night, where’s before it wasn’t a night out until the sun came up. Music at gigs has become just “that little bit too loud” and you’d rather watch it with a beer in your hand at the back, than be at the front getting crushed.

You let out a huge sigh as your body creeks when sitting down and make a muted grunting sound when getting up. More worryingly your tongue comes out to meet the spoon first and you start buying different flavours of tea because “you really like the peppermint kind”

You meet people only 3 years younger than you who haven’t heard of half the bands from the 90’s. You get told it’s not “Fluro” it’s “Neon” and when you go out, strangers morph into you what you looked like when aged 18, except with tighter jeans and more angular haircuts. Grunge is out, electro is in. At 26, chances are you don’t own a home, nor have much in the way of savings. You need a holiday but pay so much rent you can’t afford one. You don’t want a one night stand, but a one woman man. Venues which you revelled in 2 years ago seem strangely tragic and desperate.

Posters of bygone tours are still stuck on the walls depicting happier memories of headier times, clash violently with a dude in a tracksuit handing you a flyer entitling you to a free can of VB at the “exclusive R&B Superclub VIP lounge”

WTF is going on here?

But you’re not overly worried right? It’s a natural progression.

You’ve lived it up from 18-25, it’s time to start taking life seriously – it’s time to plan for the future, 30 is merely around the corner right? That’s when it “all begins”

You have a career now right? Or rather HEX debt and the bleak reality of working through the ranks of middle management for the next 5 years, simultaneously working long hours to show your commitment whilst the temp receptionist takes home more per hour. You’re old enough to know better and still young enough to be stupid. You might believe you’re mature, but you’re not wise. You’ve come to learn actions aren’t without consequence and that inaction is far more predictable. And whilst you’d like to delude yourself into think you’re fit, those visits to Macca’s in your youth are rapidly making themselves known around your waist.

So what DO you do between 26-30 to pass the time?

When nightclubs feel like high school proms and bars seem like too much hard work, apparently the trick is to take up a peculiar hobby. There’s a whole gamut actually; Thai kickboxing, book clubs to join, burlesque dance classes to attempt, knitting groups to bond in, Bondi boot camps to get yelled at, salsa lessons for the sheer novelty of it all, wine tasting to be snooty about oh and you can become a Buddhist at the weekends.

Pretty much all the activates you could have done at any age, but when you were younger, well, you just had vastly more interesting things to do. Trying to get laid, drinking copious amount of alcohol unaided, annoying your parents or learning to drive badly. By now, you might have experienced love, yet seldom lived with it. You’ve travelled on that Contiki tour of Europe, but at times still feel lost. And all that was once a blur, shifts to a slow motion capture.

“Adulthood”….sounds so medieval doesn’t it? A time of pomp and ceremony blended with tradition and presumption. We all know that at age 18 you are considered an adult in the eyes of the law. But if being an adult means my ability to drink beer, use scissors and watch Terminator 2 legally, is offset with having to pay bills, glorious fluro lit office cubicles, unsettling bank loans, the potential of going to jail and overpriced rent – then I’d rather stay as that kid who will forever be enthralled with his LEGO set.

Society as a whole, dictates that to take another life is wrong, that conceiving at 14 for example, isn’t recommended and that fundamentally you should treat everyone as an equal, we have courts, laws and government to safe guard these Western-held views.

Religion in its truest form is a shining example of the masses following the ideals, opinions, stories, aspirations and societal norms set out and decided by others, often from an entirely different time period. But for those of you who don’t subscribe to the imaginary friend that is “Jesus”, there isn’t a book for how one should ideally lead your life let alone how you’re supposed to act at a certain age.

There are as I mentioned, certain guidelines coupled with the weight of expectation from peers, friends and family. And these are the very values we install in ourselves and try to adhere to. Nobody truly likes being left behind or whispered about unfavourably behind closed doors. Nor does anyone set out to become the black sheep of the family, that underachieving friend for whom all hope is lost. So we lead our lives, in a very general way, according to what is deemed acceptable by our peers.

There is tremendous amount of pressure, that at some point we will all be subjected to and it comes in the distilled form of living up to the expectations we and society places upon ourselves. We all seek approval, attention and respect, even in the mildest of forms. The liberal point of view verses conservative point of view, will be fought right on your doorstep. When will YOU decide when political correctness goes too far?

At aged 26, I am finding myself frequently asking myself, what exactly IS expected of someone my age? What is the common bond that links people in that bracket between 25 and 30?

Rather disappointingly we can’t ALL be born into untold wealth like Paris Hilton or hold the ability to become a musical prodigy like Michael Jackson once did. We have to find something else and to me it seems, we spend most of our twenty-something’s try to find out WHAT that is. That individual spark that makes us unique, whilst not casting us out unto the outer fringes of society.

I’ll get back to you once I know, I promise.

Alex